Domestic abuse

We can help and support you if you're being affected by domestic abuse

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse is abusive behaviour including violence, control, coercion, threats between people aged 16 and over, and who are or have previously been intimate partners or family members. It can be one off or happen many times. Examples of behaviour include:

 

  • Psychological - making you feel afraid, worthless or blaming you for what is happening
  • Physical - hurting you such as kicking, hitting and holding you down 
  • Sexual - making you do things you don’t want to do, rape, not letting you practice safe sex   
  • Financial - taking your money or controlling what you spend your money on  
  • Emotional - making you feel unhappy 
  • Controlling - such as stopping you seeing your family or friends

This can happen to anyone at any time in their lives. It can affect people of all ages, genders and sexualities.

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How we can help if you're feeling frightened or want some help

We’ll believe what you’re telling us and we won’t judge you. We understand that it can be really hard to speak to someone for the first time about what is happening. We can arrange for you to speak to someone of the same gender or sexuality, where available. It’s important to remember that it is not your fault, even if the abuser has been making you feel that it is. We can:

 

  • Help you stay safe - by making a personal safety plan which might include a safe phone or personal alarm. We can also set up monitoring on your phone which you can switch on if you’re feeling at risk
  • Help make your home secure - by installing security such as changing the locks, additional bolts, chains, spy hole. (We will not be able to change the locks if the abuser is our customer)
  • Go through housing options - we can give general advice about tenancy matters and help you contact the local authority for housing options
  • Refer to specialist support - we can give you advice and work with other organisations to make sure you get all the support you need

What to do it you are worried about another person who may be being abused

If you think that someone is danger right now, call 999. If you want to speak to them, pick a safe space and time. Remember that they may not be ready to talk about what is happening, so give them time and let them know that you are there for them when they are ready. It’s important to let them know that you believe them and are not going to judge. Encourage them to seek professional advice and support – there are links below. The National DA helpline also has some tips to help support a friend or loved one.

Where can I get help and support?

Nationwide organisations 

You can find help and support from the National Domestic Violence Helpline, Women’s Aid and Refuge on this helpline number 0808 2000 247.

Other useful links:

  • Respect Men’s Advice Line – 0808 801 0327
  • Galop national LBGT+ domestic abuse helpline – 0800 999 5428
  • Karma Nirvana support for victims of so-called honour based abuse and forced marriage - 0800 5999247
  • Silent emergency calls to the police - If you need help but are unable to speak because of domestic abuse ring 999 when they answer press 55 and you’ll be transferred to the police
  • Safe space is a project to give victims an opportunity to access support for domestic abuse through pharmacies and other shops
  • BrightSky is a mobile app which gives information and support to people experiencing domestic abuse

 

Local organisations 

Hampshire:

Berkshire:

Surrey:

West Sussex

If you or someone else in your family is being hurt at home, you may not be sure what to do. Remember that it’s not your fault and you won't get into trouble for telling someone about it. The first thing is to tell someone else about what is happening to you:

  • You can tell a teacher, a neighbour, a friend or a friend's parent.
  • You can call Childline on 0800 1111 for free and they can tell you places where you can get help. They won't tell anyone else you are calling unless you’re in danger.
  • You can also find out more on The Hideout about children and young people and domestic abuse and violence.
  • The national charity, Respect, can provide support and help.

Domestic abuse policy

Find about how we work with our customers who are experiencing or have experienced domestic abuse.

Find out more